Wane

Once, “wane” was just a word that was buried deep in my mind. For me, a guy who is energetic, full of ambitions, and always leaves no effort to have the things done, a word which is always connecting with those imperfect things and recessions seems to have non-relevance with me. But radical changes happened right after she appeared in my life. “Wane” became the most precious, the most important and the most elegant word in my dictionary.

I could still recall our first met. That was a sunny September afternoon; I sat on the stair outside our classroom and played my guitar, waiting for the first class meeting in Jilin University. I immersed myself in the lingering melodies and when I looked up, I saw a lovely girl standing in front of me, wearing a broad smile with two dimples on her pinky cheeks. She’s about 1.6 meters tall and dressed in a blue dress, with a light blue ribbon tied on her waist. She bowed slightly and her hair slipped down her shoulders and flowed in the air. “My name is Wane”, she said with a sweet voice, but within a heavy Cantonese accent, “are we in the same class?” “I think so and nice to meet you.” I answered with an unnamed excitement in my heart. And I still don’t how I spend the rest of that day.

At first, we just texted to each other and greeted when we met. Soon we invited each other for walks, café, and meals. We took our classes together, had our self-study courses together and hung out together. Everything seems so bright until October 16th, exactly the date when I knew I was in the list of SM3 scholars.

Time passed even faster from that day. November in Changchun means nothing but freezing cold. She invited me to a movie the night before the last day I spent in Changchun. To be honest, I couldn’t summon my memory about the movie we watched, but all I knew was that she leaned on me and slept tightly.

On our way back, we were unnaturally speechless, unlike what we were like. Piles of words fought for the priority of coming out first but all of them were unable to persuade the others and just stuck in my throat. Then I just sighed, watching the white mist I breathed out dissolved in the air. I looked up at the sky, only to find a waning moon, looming in the floating clouds.

She broke the stiff atmosphere with a naughty request:” Lend me your hands, I’m so cold.” Then she started taking off her gloves. “What are you doing, put…” I couldn’t finish the sentence because she was already in my arms, sobbing. “Don’t go. Who else will remind me to put on more clothes, who else will tell me to bring my umbrella, who else will bring snacks to the class in case I’m hungry, who else will collect the medicine for me when I’m sick, who else will comfort me when I’m upset, who else will encourage me when I’m low, who else will care about me? You said you would play The Castle in the Sky for me whenever I want to listen, but you just failed your promise, how can you play it if you are not beside me, I didn’t hear enough. Please, don’t leave me alone.”

I could do nothing but hold her tight, and fondle her soft black hair. Reasons are as pale as a sheet in front of her words. When she calmed down, I just took off my scarf, tied on her neck, wiped the tears off her face, and murmured, “I’ll be with you, as the always.” She smiled, then took a deep breath, and said, “I’m so sorry for being capricious. Please forgive me. I’m sorry. I know, really, that I shouldn’t be the obstacle in your way, just go for what you want. ” After these devastating words, I couldn’t hold my tears anymore.

Nights drifted, and the final moment came. The car was leaving. I looked through the window, only to see that she was standing there, waving her hands, wearing my scarf, and waning.